What Is And What Should Never Be
by etoilette
Summary: James and Narcissa accidently fall under the spell of a love potion.
1. Chapter 1

This wasn't supposed to happen.

* * *

The plan was to slip Snivellus a love potion (it was actually more of a powder, but nevermind that) that'd make him fall in love with the first person with whom he made eye contact and then make a complete and utter fool of himself. They'd even worked it out so that Mcgonagall'd be the object of his affection.

It was a good plan.

It wasn't supposed to happen like this.

* * *

(Sirius blames Evans.)

* * *

They were on their way to transfiguration when Evans bombarded them.

"You missed the prefects' meeting last night – " she tapered off, taking in the hand behind James's back and the guilty-but-trying-not-to-look-guilty expression on Peter's face, and narrowed her eyes. "What're you up to?"

"How dare you accuse us of being 'up to' something! I'm wounded, Lily. _Wounded_." With that, James marched off in feigned offense, turning around and shaking his head in disgust as he did so.

* * *

They collided and tumbled to the floor in a flurry of books and quills and limbs.

* * *

"You weren't looking where you were going."

"_You_ weren't looking where _you_ were going."

"You were _walking backward_, you idiot. Ugh. And you've gone and gotten glass all over. And _p_ink _p_owder."

James started.

He looked at Narcissa brushing herself off, then at the shards of glass dusting the floor and the powder rapidly dissolving in the air, then at Narcissa.

Their eyes met.

"_Shit_."


	2. Chapter 2

"This is bad."

* * *

James lolls on his bed starry-eyed. Remus and Peter look on amused. Sirius paces back and forth in front of them, stopping every now and then to shoot a glare at his friend.

* * *

" … Her hair's so long and blonde and _shiny_. I love it when she wears it up in a knot like one of those muggle dancers in the frilly skirts, and it's all light and loose and wispy; she looks like some sort of _water nymph_. and her lips – "

* * *

Sirius slaps him.

* * *

"Get it together, man!"

"Ow! That _hurt_, you _bastard_!"

"You are _not_ in love with Narcissa!"

James's eyes light up all over again. "Love? D'you know? I think I _am_ in love with Narcissa. I'm in love with Narcissa. I'm in love with Narcissa – "

Sirius lunges at James, but Remus grabs the back of his robes and reins him in.

"Relax, Padfoot. The love potion'll wear off in a couple of hours. And, yeah, it's Prongs. And your cousin. But, look at him. He's acting like an idiot, and it's bloody funny, and we'll be able to hold this over him for ages."

* * *

Sirius considers this.

* * *

(James has picked up where he left off: " – I love her. And i want to kiss her sweet sweet lips. And – ")

* * *

Sirius forces out a "fine" through gritted teeth.

* * *

("D'you think she's a virgin?")

* * *

"But i retain the right to _strangle_ him."

* * *

**Author's notes: **If anyone is reading this fic, I'd really really _really_ appreciate feedback. I'm new to writing. And I have OCD, so my style can be kinda stilted. If you could just let me know you're reading it, period, that'd be great. Thanks!

And, by the way, the title's from the Led Zeppelin song of the same name.


	3. Chapter 2, Part 2

Narcissa stares after James as his friends drag him off down the corridor and Evans calls at him to come back she's talking to him.

Hmm.

"Has Potter always been that ridiculously good-looking?"

Esmée, Honoria, and Salcilia exchange glances. "Potter? James Potter?"

"Look at him – tall, dark, and handsome. And he has gorgeous eyes. hazel. With a hint of green. Like mint-chocolate."

"Just last week you said James Potter was a scarab beetle with bad hair."

"Did i?"

"Yeah."

"Scarab beetles can actually be rather attractive."

"Yeah. But they _eat dung_."

* * *

**Author's notes:** I'm so sorry that it's been so long, and, if you're still reading this, thank you so much! As always, I'd really really _really_ appreciate feedback. Is there anything you'd like to see happen? Or any ships? And you can also read this at my livejournal of the same name.


	4. Chapter 3

When Potter turns up in potions, Lily has a tirade ready for him, but before she can open her mouth, he jumps on Narcissa Black's desk, slides across it, almost slides off it, regains his balance, and dons a cocky grin.

Good God.

"Bonjour."

Narcissa smiles. _Smiles_.

* * *

Sirius grabs Potter by his tie.

"You're choking me!"

"Good."

* * *

"What the fuck?"

* * *

James and Narcissa eye each other throughout the lesson, and Professor Slughorn claps his hands and cries, "Ah! Young love!" Sirius looks like he's homicidal, and, beside her, Severus is positively giddy (she can tell, because he's frowning rather than scowling).

Once again: "What the fuck?"

"What's it matter what's going on, as long as Potter's not harassing you?"

* * *

(Lily thinks she sees Severus smile.)

* * *

After class, James falls to his knees in front of Narcissa.

"My flower! My beautiful flower! Marry me! Ugh, what am I thinking? You don't want to marry me. You, who are so beautiful. At least do me the honor of accompanying me to Hogsmeade this weekend. I'll buy you a dog. I'll buy you a house. By the sea. Oh, Narcissa, light of my life, I want to make love to you – "

* * *

He spends the rest of the day in his dormitory, under the supervision of his roommates.

* * *

The next morning, James wakes up to Sirius being his usual playful self.

"Thank _fuck_ that love potion's worn off by now, am I right, mate?"

Images of Narcissa flicker through his mind – long blonde hair, blue eyes, a soft but sly smile; his heart _melts_.

Once again: "Shit."


	5. Chapter 4

She dreams about him.

* * *

She tells herself this is just a lingering side effect of the love potion.

* * *

He isn't in the Great Hall, and she sighs in relief (or disappointment, but she doesn't want to examine the feeling too closely).

* * *

An owl drops an envelope in her oatmeal, and she picks it up gingerly. Her name is scrawled across it in a messy-but-trying-to-be-neat hand.

"Ooh," says Esmée, leaning across the table to get a better look. "What is it?"

"Is it from Potter?" smirks Salcilia.

It is.

Salcilia and Honoria snicker. Narcissa glares at them, but they giggle even more, and Esmée joins in.

* * *

It's a love letter.

* * *

It's the first love letter she's ever gotten.

* * *

It reads: "Dearest Narcissa, How unfortunate it is that our love is being thwarted, and in such an ungentlemanly manner! Why, I was driven to extreme means to get this letter to you! But you are worth it, and so much more! Oh, Narcissa, ma chère, my flower, how can I, who am but your humble slave, express the depth of my love for you? It is a bottomless sea, and I want to swim in it with you, preferably naked … "

* * *

(At this point, she retreats to the privacy of the loo.)

* * *

The thing goes on for ten pages, becoming increasingly graphic, and, by the last page, it has descended into pornography entirely.

* * *

She feels hot all over.

* * *

That's new.

* * *

At that, she resolves to put an end to this nonsense once and for all.

* * *

They run into her in the corridor.

* * *

She's flushed and flustered, and her eyes flash when she sees him.

* * *

His first thought is: "She looks wonderfully debauched."

* * *

She drags him into an empty classroom, leaving Sirius scowling behind them.

"I got your letter."

(A wave of embarrassment washes over him, but it doesn't last; he doesn't have a whole lot of shame.)

Habit – and lust – kicks in, and he leers at her. "Did you like it? You look like you liked it."

"Shut it."

Then she shoves him against the wall, presses her body to his, and kisses him.

* * *

**Author's notes:** Thanks to everyone who read and/or reviewed the last chapters! I hope you enjoyed this one! Let me know what you think re the writing, plot, characterization (but please keep in mind that this is my first fic), or if you have any suggestions!


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